I think when we loose a parent we loose a huge part of ourselves and the anchor to our identity. For selfish reasons I want you to stay, your writing means and has meant so much to me as I rediscover what being a single woman in my forties can feel like and the repeated permission for freedom and self expression your words so often offer. But, if you need to burn every word and tangible thing down to the ground to rise in a new more powerful form then you have given enough already to all of us and it's time to do whatever serves you the best. I hope you stay, I hope you continue to write through your process, but above all else I hope you finally give to yourself half as much as you've given to everyone else. If you come to the UK you can have a sofa in the New Forest instead of a bench.